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Wednesday, June 09, 2010

The ball commeth!


This is the last sane moment that I will have for some time. It has been carved out of a period when I should have been marking, but I simply couldn’t face it and I have watched (indeed am watching, thank goodness for touch typing) Spain rather comprehensively beating Poland at football.

I cannot truthfully say that I am “looking forward” to the televisual overkill that will be World Cup football – the advent of which is drawing ominously closer heralded by rather artful advertisements on the TV and pages of technical information in the newspapers. I am praying that the weather is clement so that I can retire to the Third Floor and brood like Achilles in his tent – though I seem to recall his retirement was for rather different reasons than the movement of various spheroids. Considering that comparison a little further I feel that it is rapidly becoming infelicitous!

I shall however condescend to watch Spain play and England too as long as they are played at a reasonable hour. In previous years I have bought the equivalent of “Every Boys Colour Guide to the World Cup” so that I could throw a few facts into the general conversation to show just how conversant I was with the detail of the “beautiful game.” It’s hard work though, and I am always found out!

I will make sure that I have a supply of books to keep me sane.

My second lesson with my pupil is today and it will be interesting to see how he has responded to the stimulus I sent him the day before yesterday. Some money would be nice too!

Marking is now dominating the entire life of the school with monastic rows of teachers bent over their vellum (well, light excreta coloured recycled paper) scripts as they scratch away with a manic concentrated intensity trying to process the reams of sometimes inventive drivel to arrive at the magic mark out of ten that is the end result of all the work which is done in Spanish schools!

It now turns out that, unlikely though it may seem, that Castelldefels boasts a soap shop. Not, in itself of interest, until you add the fact that this is a Welsh soap shop! Soaps, the website informs us, from the “woodlands of Wales.” This will have to be investigated!

I now have collected all the scripts that have to be marked by my good self. There was a moment of pleasurable panic when it seemed like half a set of scripts had gone missing but while I was invigilating one exam a colleague brought them to me, presumably so that I could fill in the empty hours when I was not in school by marking them. She obviously doesn’t know me very well!

To be fair I have marked two sets of scripts: one from a fairly small class and the other from a larger class with a paper which seemed to stretch on to eternity: I lost the will to live on three separate occasions while marking it.

I also discovered a use for recycled paper.

My scripts came in two varieties: the dun coloured recycled sort and good white cartridge paper. The cartridge paper was bulky and emphasised the number of scripts left, while the recycled sort was thin and flaccid and gave a flattering picture of what was left. I am going to insist that all future scripts are printed on thin paper: the psychological effect of seeing an insignificant scattering of scripts rather than an intimidating stack!

My second “lesson” with my new pupil in Barcelona took the form of a “conversation” in a cafe on a table outside on the little Ramblas in this particular part of the city. Our conversation took in Egyptian pharaohs Frank Lloyd Wright, Charles Rennie Mackintosh, Palladio, Gaudi (of course!) and restaurants which do not look like restaurants.

The last was pointed out to me a few shops down from the garage in which I was parked. The shop front looks like a dry cleaning shop but, on the wall is an illuminated numeric touchpad – type in the right combination of numbers and lo and behold! You find yourself in a most exclusive restaurant. Where, I was told, the prices are not that expensive. Or it could be a normal dry cleaning shop. But I do hope not!

Meanwhile my revolving and reclining chair has taken on a life of its own and sitting on it has become something of a challenging experience. I fear that the fault may be terminal - and if you think that furniture is overpriced I suggest you come to Catalonia and have a look in quite ordinary furniture shop to wonder if you have slipped by mistake into some sort of designer shop.

I popped into a shop just before the “lesson” and found a fairly ordinary revolving chair for €1.750! I was told that I could take 17% off the price or even more if I was buying them in bulk! Another chair for only €980 was smilingly dismissed as the cheap end of the market! I suppose that I should have been warned as soon as I saw that they stocked Philip Stark chairs!

At least I got paid!

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